


Jealousy

by orphan_account



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: Fluff, Jealousy, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-16
Updated: 2014-04-16
Packaged: 2018-01-19 16:00:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1475680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fíli has always loved his brother, but one night out has him reassessing exactly <i>how</i> he loves him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jealousy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [possessed-bylight (free_pirate)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/free_pirate/gifts).



Fíli sometimes felt as though he’d been chasing after Kíli their entire lives.

It had been distressingly literal when they were young and Fíli had been called on to mind his younger brother while his mother was busy. Kíli had been a bright and curious child, and from the time he could crawl he’d gotten into everything he could reach.

It took all of a day for him to start running once he’d learned to walk, and suddenly Fíli was in danger of losing his brother constantly as the little hellion raced through the yard and managed to get out the gate.

(Fíli never noticed the way Kíli would glace around constantly, making sure his big brother was nearby. He didn’t see the times Kíli plopped down and waited when Fíli was out of sight, unwilling to go on any adventures without his brother by his side.)

As they grew up, Fíli knew his mother and uncle were expecting them to grow apart as well, but he found he couldn't stand the thought of leaving his brother. So he stuck to Kíli’s side like a burr, determined not to lose him, not to let him grow up and leave.

(He didn't see the way Kíli gravitated towards him whenever they were in the same room, nor the way Kíli stared at him with wide and adoring eyes.)

And as Fíli grew older still, despite his own best efforts to ignore it he found his thoughts lingering on his brother. For all Kíli focused on him whenever he was in the room, no matter who else was present, for all the time they spent together without any interlopers, for all the way Kíli smiled and laughed with him, he grew jealous of others Kíli spent time with. He found himself craving his brother’s company more and more, hating the time he had to be apart from him.

Things came to a head one day when Fíli had to stay long at the forge, missing dinner and remaining at his work into the evening. He finally returned home, sweaty and exhausted and hoping to have a quiet night and find some solace in a few moments alone with Kíli.

Instead, he found his mother keeping his share of dinner warm and his brother gone to the tavern.

"Where's Kíli?" he asked her, too tired to hide his disappointment at his brother's absence.

"He went down to the tavern," Dis replied, to all appearances as though she didn't even notice how downtrodden Fíli looked at the news.

Fíli stoically absorbed the blow and set to eating his dinner at long last. It was probably good--Dis was an excellent cook--but he didn't really taste it. As the moments wore on, indignation began to take root in his mind. He'd been working himself to the bone all day, only to come home to find Kíli, his brother, his best friend, had just gone haring off to the tavern without a thought. Ungrateful little wretch. He had half a mind to go down and drag Kíli back by the ear.

He'd managed to work himself up into a lather by the time he was done, and began pulling his boots back on with jerky movements.

"Going somewhere?" Dis murmured, not even looking up.

"Fetching home my layabout of a brother," Fíli growled, but she only hummed in response.

"Good luck, darling."

He stormed out of the house, grumbling to himself as he stomped off in a huff. He managed to keep his head of steam up all the way to the tavern, slammed through the door, and stopped dead.

Kíli was there. He was laughing and happy, with other Dwarves, other Dwarves who weren’t Fíli, but that wasn’t the worst of it.

The worst was a lass perched on his lap, her arm slung carelessly about his neck.

Fíli’s rage was suddenly quenched by the leaden jealousy that weighed down his stomach and the icy realization that went with it. This wasn’t the slow, nauseous burn of being jealous of Kíli’s time and attention he was used to. This was a sharp, painful jab of possessiveness, an overpowering desire to rip the girl off his Kíli and make it clear who he belonged to.

He nearly stumbled with the force of it. Oh. Oh. Well. That…that would certainly explain some things (that feeling of good and right and home he got in the pit of his stomach when Kíli’s eyes caught the light, or when the wind played through his hair just so, the unbridled joy he felt when Kíli laughed and so many others too many to count) but he couldn’t let Kíli see him now, not when his realization must be writ so clearly on his face. He turned to leave, just as he heard Kíli call his name.

“Fíli! Join us!” He glanced back. Kíli had pushed away the girl, Fíli was gratified to see, and had stood to welcome his brother.

His brother.

There was nothing else to do. Fíli fled.

Unfortunately, Kíli ran after him.

There was no hope of losing him. They’d devoted so much of their lives to being together as often as possible, neither really knew how to get rid of the other. Kíli would track him down. And if he let things get too out of hand, their mother would catch on that something was going on, and she might well bring in their uncle.

Fíli slowed to a stop, letting Kíli catch up.

“Fíli, what’s going on? What’s wrong?” Kíli asked, coming up to his brother’s side.

“Nothing,” Fíli said, too fast and too forced. “There’s nothing wrong. Just…just go back to the tavern.”

Kíli stared at him in disbelief. Fíli winced internally. He’d never had to lie to Kíli before; he wasn’t quite sure how he was meant to go about it.

“Nothing. That’s why you turned and left the moment you walked in the doors, is it, nothing?” Kíli’s voice was flat and unimpressed, with a bit of annoyance.

Fíli’s earlier anger came roaring back. What right did Kíli have to be annoyed? He was the one hanging around taverns with all sorts, letting strange women hang off him.

“Why do you even care?” he snapped, rounding on Kíli abruptly. "Just go off with your friends. It's nothing to do with you."

And of course Kíli only planted himself all the more firmly. "No. Something's wrong, and I want to know what it is."

"Leave. It. Alone," Fíli said, glaring.

"Talk to me."

"For once in your life would you just mind your own business!" Fíli shouted, going so far in his desperation as to shove Kíli away.

A flash of hurt crossed Kíli’s face; it must've been from the words, as they'd done worse to each other than a little push in their brotherly scuffles. But he persevered.

"Would you just talk to me, you stubborn fool?" Kíli had gone past annoyed and was now approaching irritated.

Fíli had moved beyond irritated a while ago, though. “As if you could actually be any help! Just go back to your friends, Kíli. You were having a fine enough time with them, weren’t you? You certainly looked like you were enjoying yourself. You and that…that girl you were with.”

Kíli froze, staring at Fíli with a look of dawning realization. All traces of anger had drained from his face. Fíli stared back, stomach slowly sinking.

“Fíli, you sound jealous,” Kíli said, slowly. “More than normal, I mean.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Fíli snapped, too quickly.

“You’re jealous.”

“I’m not!”

“You are.”

“Don’t be stupid.”

“You are,” Kíli said, taking a step forward. “Well, you usually are, but this…were you…were you jealous of the girl?”

It was too much. Flustered by Kíli’s questions, Fíli’s anger, annoyance, and desperation, all compounded by the lingering shock of discovering the feelings he had kept hidden even from himself, made him forget all restraint for a moment.

"You're mine," he burst out, emotions overcoming his sense. "She had no right to have her hands on you like that. And you—you let her. I don't—how could you—”

"It's not generally a good idea to go around making a scene when a pretty lass drops into your lap," Kíli replied slowly. "Better to humor her for a moment, then nudge her off all subtle. Not as many hurt feelings, nor grudges, nor suspicions. Fíli, I...you don't mean—that is, what—”

One last chance to deny his feelings, to say that he was only offended Kíli hadn’t waited for him. But. Kíli hadn't wanted the girl. And while that might not mean anything on its own, when he spoke of Fíli’s intense jealousy he did not seem disgusted. There was something almost like interest in his eyes, and something like hope burned in the pit of Fíli’s stomach.

“I’m in love with you,” he said. His voice shook, and he couldn’t look Kíli in the eye, but he said it. “I can’t stand the thought of anyone else touching you. I want—I want _you_.”

Kíli stared at him for an eternity, lips parted as if to speak. Fíli shifted. He was beginning to regret ever speaking when Kíli finally broke the silence.

“Yes,” he said, so softly Fíli could barely hear him.

“What?”

“Yes. I…I feel that way too.”

They met each other’s eyes and stood there, neither daring to take the step forward, neither daring to say anything further. Slowly, what Kíli had said sunk in, and Fíli started to smile. An answering grin lit up Kíli’s face, and it struck Fíli how ridiculous they must look, standing a few steps apart and just grinning foolishly at each other.

He stepped forward just as Kíli did the same, and they clasped hands when they reached each other. Suddenly shy, Fíli glanced at Kíli’s mouth and glanced away. It was odd to think about kissing his brother, little Kíli who had spent his time grubbing about in the dirt. But it was painful to think about Kíli kissing anyone else.

Kíli, meanwhile, had apparently had enough of Fíli’s dithering. He leaned forward and kissed him, carefully and chastely.

But for all it was chaste, it was passionate. Fíli’s world was shaken to its core, and remade anew. Everything about this felt _right_. It would take some time for them to be comfortable with this new aspect of their relationship, but standing there in the dark street, kissing his brother under the starlight, he knew he was exactly where he was meant to be.


End file.
